Hello!! Hope you’re having a good start to your week!
I also hope you’ve all been loving the spreadsheets!! I’ve had quite a few messages telling me to please put my feet up and enjoy maternity leave, which I promise I am doing. I’ve just discovered that I can, in fact, lie down AND make a spreadsheet at the same time, so everyone wins.
And of course, happy 1st of September!! I absolutely love this time of year because September still gives me that back-to-school feeling where I want to get really organised. Except this year I’m channelling all of that energy into baby prep. I’m currently very invested in perfecting my caddies and working out what needs to live where, which is basically my version of stationery shopping at this point.
And I have to say I am SO ready for autumn. I love summer, but I think being heavily pregnant has made me more excited than ever for the temperature to drop a few degrees. I’m ready for cosy evenings, autumn clothes, Sunday roasts, and not checking the weather forecast with genuine fear.
I saw a post about frictionmaxxing a few months ago and immediately went down a rabbit hole on it. And what better time to unpack it than September 1st, when we’re all suddenly pretending we’re going back to school and getting our lives together. I’ve always been someone who thinks most things worth having require some effort, so it got me thinking about what happens when we get so obsessed with making life easier that we start removing all the bits that might actually be good for us.
Also, if you haven’t watched the full episode yet, I’ve dropped it below.
I can completely see why this has all added up and left you feeling so hurt. Like, yes, plans change, and people have their own lives, but if you’re constantly coming away from situations feeling like an afterthought, I don’t think you should just keep telling yourself you’re expecting too much. There is a very big difference between expecting someone to prioritise you all the time and just wanting the people you love to consider you.
Also, and I say this as someone who definitely has a tendency to do too much, I think sometimes you have to stop giving people the version of you that goes above and beyond when they’re not meeting you anywhere near there. Not in a petty, “well you didn’t text me so I’m not texting you” way, but just stop bending over backwards. You can be a really generous friend and also say no, not lend the money, not rearrange your entire week, not always be the one making the plan.
And I honestly think I’d use this as a bit of a reset. Don’t cut everyone off tomorrow, but pay attention to who actually shows up when you stop doing all the work. I think you’ll probably learn quite a lot from that. And then put your energy into those people, because being caring doesn’t mean everyone is automatically entitled to the same amount of you. x
Next week we’re kicking off something for the podcast I’ve been working on since January, I am so excited to release it. First person to guess correctly in the @WorkingHardPod DMs gets a £20 TALA voucher.
I hope you have a wonderful week & I’ll see you very soon,
